Waiting

You know what you want to do when you're facing round two of cancer and you feel so bad you're comparing it to how you felt on chemo last time?

Wait.

Wait for tests
Wait for results
Wait for appointments
Wait for more tests
Wait for more results
Wait at the ER
Wait wait wait

So my mom's oncologist appointment was cancelled because they didn't have all the results back from her biopsy, but they had to have gotten some of them back because they scheduled her for a bone marrow aspiration last week. That's a clue, because the insurance wouldn't have paid for the procedure without cause, which means the results they did have weren't good.

She goes back this Wednesday for all the results. We already know the cancer is back. Mom feel awful. She can't eat; she's lost weight; she sleeps a LOT. We went up to see her for a day this weekend and she couldn't hardly play with the kids, which is the opposite of my mom.

On her last visit to the ER she overheard the doc saying "Hodgkin's lymphoma." Last time around it was non-Hodgkin's lymphoma of the thyroid. This time they are looking at her liver. I'm praying they didn't find anything in the bone marrow.

We will all be super relieved to have an official diagnosis and treatment plan. The waiting sucks. It's been over a month since she first called her oncologist to schedule the PET. It's been three months or more since she started suspecting her cancer was back. It's been seven months since she started getting sick again. It's time to get this party started.