Memo to the Customer Service People at the MS State Health Insurance Program:
This isn't hard. Really. We will be paying you nearly as much as we paid on our mortgage each month. The least I expect in return in insurance coverage, but I wouldn't mind a little helpfulness along the way.
Clearly, making a pregnant woman cry was low, but hanging up on me was an act of war. I suggest you get a few things figured out before I call back in 5-7 business days to ask, for the FOUTH TIME and after TWO MONTHS, if you have my health insurance set up. FYI, the correct answer to that question is, "Yes, mam."
Memo to my Stomach:
I am your slave. I will give you anything you want to make you happy, but please, I beg you, give me a clue as to what that is. I have offered you many options today and you have rejected them all. I will go to any lengths, buy any food item you want, but you have to give me a clue, a hint, something. There has to be something out there that will make you happy today.
Memo to my Pup:
I'm sorry I disturbed your sleep, your highness. Just wait until the new little furless puppy with the warm, dry nose arrives. You have no idea.
Memo to my House:
Screw it. Clean yourself.