Thursday, March 26, 2009


I mentioned before that I quickly realized that being home wasn't going to be like I thought it would be.

When we first started talking about me leaving my job it was the first of the year. I resigned at the end of January, and we found out we were pregnant three weeks later. I spent nearly two months coming up with schedules and plans and meals I wanted to make. I developed a whole lot of expectations for myself, which all went up in smoke when I started feeling the effects of pregnancy.

I really don't like not having the energy to take care of my household and family. To be honest, the only thing keeping me from feeling like a failure and falling into the depths of despair is my husband.

He says things like, "Why don't you go take a nap?" instead of, "Why aren't there any clean towels anywhere in the house?" He brings me a glass of water every morning before he leaves for work so I can take my nausea meds and go back to sleep for another hour or so instead of suggesting I need to get up and get something done. He is happy with Chick Fila for dinner when I should have made the lasagna I had planned.

I know this will pass. I've been promised I'll feel better on week 14, but that's not until the end of April, and BFF Jen never did get that luxury. I'm hoping to gradually start doing a little more on days when I feel better so I don't feel so guilty on days when I can't hardly move (like today!).


Sandi said...

That's the worst. Here's hoping week 14 gets here soon. :)

tgtank said...

My sickness passed about then. Hopefully yours will too. But, if it doesn' NOT feel guilty about it. Housework is no big deal, it can wait. The reward is unbelievable after those nine months. :)

GrammarGirl said...

I know you've heard it. I know you have, but it bears repeating. Two things: Your body is working super hard to provide for your growing baby. Everything is adjusting to the new life inside you. Don't fight it. Rejoice in the miracle of life and the fact that you are able to stay home. Can you imagine trying to work your old job now?
And number two: your child(ren) will not care how clean your house is, but how much you love and care for him or her. Your husband feels the same way. There are important things in life, and a clean house, right now, is not one of them. Neither is a perfect schedule of meals and plans. Make small goals, very small, and enjoy meeting them in a time frame that works for you. And let's do lunch again sometime soon.

Susan said...

Oh I know it. And I'm grateful. Greg's been awesome. On the bad days I just feel like I'm not doing my part. I know it's silly. I'm doing the best I can. I know I'm in a much better position than I could be!

GrammarGirl said...

And did I mention how out of whack your hormones are, which adds to your ill feelings.